The Day has arrived. I thought it never would. I had no reference for anything like this in my past. I didn’t know what to expect, and I had no clue what I was doing, but I did it all the same. “What did I do?” You ask.
Well, I published a real-life novel, available now on Amazon and Kindle.
Soon I will be holding my very own copy of my very own book. I swear, I never thought this would be possible just six months ago. I dreamed about one day being a published author, but I had no clue how I would get there or if I ever would. It was as they call it, a pipe dream. But that is the magic of the program of AA.
I didn’t know that by working the 12 steps and taking the simple, not natural action of getting sober and working a spiritual program, that my dreams could become a reality. It was such a simple answer too. It usually is. I remember the day it started; I had just finished a book called “Start With Why.” By Simon Sinek, which is all about figuring out the “Why” of your life and working from that point. It is the reason the program of AA works so well. AA has a defined “Why,” and there can be no deviation from it. The programs Why is to find a new, better way to live without Alcohol and its main purpose is accomplished by the “How,” which is the 12 steps. A simple program of action, and the “What,” becomes all these beautiful gifts of a sober, spiritual life.
Anyway, one day two months ago, October 11th to be exact. I wrote what my “Why” was; then because I needed a job, I began to look for work with that “Why” in mind.
Well, I got two job interviews set up that day for positions I thought were my dream jobs, coaching football and recruiting. So, I got dressed up and went to my first job interview — a recruiting position at a reasonably new scouting firm; I was so excited. I ended up walking around midtown for an hour in 90-degree heat, looking for the building, calling my contact multiple times and getting no response. After an hour bloodied and drenched in sweat, I gave up. I was literally bleeding, don’t buy dress shoes from Walmart, your feet will thank you. What a massive failure, I didn’t even go to the next interview, which was for a coaching position at a junior college. I was so angry and honestly just over the whole work thing, haha. It is funny how things happen in life that seem like huge failures but end up being the kick in the ass that is genuinely required for success.
I said to myself that day, “Matt you didn’t get sober to keep doing the same miserable things you have done your whole freaking life. It is time to try something different,” and I did. I was so motivated not to have to live like I have lived my entire life that I started writing, because If you want to be a writer, you have to write. Starting just over two months ago now and have published two… TWO FREAKING BOOKS!! I previously never thought it was possible.
Here is my take away, I discovered my “Why” and the way I went about accomplishing it was the same way I had gone about my life, My whole Life. The program of AA teaches me to try something different, keep an open mind, be willing to take action when an opportunity arises, and stay honest. If I expect for my life to be different, then I need to be different. I never thought that I would spend hundreds of hours in front of a computer screen writing, and it would become the most joyful, fulfilling experience of my life. But it has, and it is a miracle of working a program of recovery through AA.
I say all that to say: Knowing that I need to be different is one thing. Actually taking action to do something completely different is another. I could have let all the past failures keep me from writing and publishing my own books. I was laughed out of the writing center in college, unable to spell my last name until 3rd grade. I am not a genius by any stretch, but I did make a decision. I decided I would no longer be limited by fears or not knowing exactly how to do something. I just started doing it and you know what, I figured the rest of the stuff out along the way. That is what life is, no one is born with a pre-existing knowledge of everything they will ever do in life. It takes some guts and some faith and a lot of action to do the things I want to do in life. I am just willing to do those things today, thanks to AA.
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