I wrote a post an hour ago about 5 steps to the discovering the meaning of your life. It was inspired and full of great advice. It made me feel a certain way like oh yeah that is it. That is how you do it.
I felt like it was being written through me by something else. I knew that it would help a lot of people. I was so grateful for the ideas that came to me and the ability to write such an incredible post and be able to share it with the world.
Well, I hit publish and the post was deleted. How you ask, who knows but it is gone. If I said I was disappointed that would be an understatement. I felt like flipping tables over and punching walls, and actually I still kind of do feel that way.
I have meditated and showered since the time my post was deleted and I was actually in the process of rewriting it when I realized, the inspiration that filled me was gone. I was no longer writing from inspiration, it felt more like I was trying to plagiarize someone else’s work.
How frustrating. What’s the lesson? Where is the Lesson in this? I spend so much time trying to give of myself for others and to have it just wiped away because of some stupid freaking computer glitch or whatever.
I want to scream. ha ha. Damn it.
It is so amazing, I go from a point of feeling true enlightenment (honest to God, how I felt this morning writing the now deleted post) to absolute frustration and anger in the drop of a hat.
Was I really enlightened then?
I think I was. I think enlightenment is something that we gain and regain over and over through out life and all its experiences. We have enlightened moments. But I am not sure there is anyone who maintains constant enlightenment.
Because that would mean a form of perfection which I understand is not possible for us mere mortals.
So, here is the lesson for me today when all my work gets wiped from the face of the earth.
Just keep going. Just keep going. Damn it just keep going. Even after you discover the secret of life and hit publish to share it with the world only to have it disappear beyond the clouds to wear leprechauns fly and socks lost in the dryer go.
Just keep going. Just keep going. Discover… ReDiscover… Discover… ReDiscover…
Just keep going. to know the meaning of life is not to say that “I am done living now, ok God I understand. Did I win?” It is to continue to discover new meaning in each moment.
I discovered for the moment that I wrote that article something for myself. Now I must go back out in to the world and rediscover more meaning.
Because, we never stop growing, we never stop learning and we must Keep going.
But God that Article would have changed your life. Haha oh well another day.