Lucy Paul Joins me for an awesome fun time. We read from her book Wait for me. We play tons of games and talk about sexy nonsense. Lucy is a lot of fun to talk to and just released her very first Novel Wait For Me, with the sequel due out in the summer.
Pretty cool accomplishment this morning 1000 Likes and I believe it is fitting that it came on a guest blog post.
Because, If it were not for the amazing people in the community that read what I write and the writers that want to be apart of my blog I wouldn’t have reached this Milestone.
S.C Jensen is a wonderfully unique and gifted writer that I met here on WordPress. She is a published author and I would say a good friend that has helped me become a better writer. She says that the magic of writing lies within the editing process for her and I think that is magnificent. She currently won 2nd place for a short story she wrote. If you are not already following this wonderful Lady please check her out at https://scjensen.com/ and by her book “The Time Keepers War”. For more about her watch the interview we did Here.
I am the Weaver. You cannot see me unless you know where to look. But I am here, watching; I have always been here.
And I have always known you.
The threads of my mind tell your story. All the stories of humankind are spun from the gossamer of my dreams. You may never see me, but everyone sees a piece of my work. For some, it is a tapestry, bright and colorful and lush with sensual details. Some tangle themselves in a silver net of lies and what-ifs and other people’s threads. Some find the evidence of my labor etched in their own flesh, a web of sorrow and laughter worn like a mask until the end of days.
No one escapes my weaving.
I do not seek to judge. My threads know no right or wrong. I seek only to reveal the ways of being in the world. To connect the ugliness with the beauty and twine them together in a fat little bundle of life-giving juices, that is what I do.
Though not everyone has a taste for truth without judgment. Empathy is a bittersweet medicine.
There are those who fear me, who attempt to destroy my work. So I stay hidden in the dark places. I lurk at the edges of things, observing and collecting and piecing together fragments of forgotten things. I work tirelessly, ceaselessly, in the dusky corners of the brain. And when they tear me down, I rebuild. I pick up the dropped threads and mend the holes of fear and forgetfulness. The stories weave themselves through me. I cannot be destroyed.
If I stop weaving, humankind stops dreaming. Without dreams, what is a man but a stone made of flesh and bone?
You may never see me, but my threads are always here for those who seek them. Give a little pull to see the vibration of your story against another, to see where each and every story connects to your own. Find a little bundle of truth to sample. See yourself in the tapestry, the web, the fine lines…
I woke up angry this morning, with rage and vengeance. I had this feeling to go and get in a fight. I wanted to attack.
I feel as if I have been sitting back being pleasant to everyone around me. While most have come to my door with pleasantness I have had many show up with anger and hate.
The part of me that loves people wants to let these people in and try and bring a smile to their face, try and change the sickness in them with what I believe is a better way.
But it is this where I want to fight. I see these people who go after goodwill and happiness and I want to stomp them out of existence with all the rage and fury of a Neutron Star exploding.
Then I remember it is not my job to judge this person’s journey or how they interact and interpret the world. It is only my responsibility to keep my door barred to such creatures that walk amongst me.
I am not a savior or a hero, I am another Joe on the Bus, trying to make it home.
When the terror of others madness corrupts my peace I have to be willing to keep them out. And if they kick in my door, then and only then do I bring down the wrath and anger so uniquely refined by my years in Hell.
I will not suffer for the lot that stays amongst the sufferable Lot. I will not fall victim to the cunning monster inside of me that whispers guidance to let the monster at the door in.
Of course, my monster wants company.
It is nonsense to believe I am above anything or anyone. I am no better than anything or anyone, and I have been the monster at the door.
The Rage born of suffering, still lives and breaths deep within me and begs every so often to get out.
To destroy…
To right the wrongs…
To fight for me…
When in the End…
The Rage inside…
The Monster I made…
Only exists for one purpose…
Not to kill the monsters outside…
But…
To destroy the one that brought it into this unjust place…
To Kill the creator that allowed it life…
Because the Monster feels Rage at the world…
The Monster knows the Rage only grows with each kill…
The Monster knows that the only way to end the Suffering…
Is to end the one who breathed life into its Monstrous form…
The Monster does not see that He and I are one, so the monster given free rein will kill me to save itself and in so doing end Itself.
I met Matt Poole via Twitter and since that time he has been nothing but helpful and a delight, being of service where ever possible. His faith and his journey is a strong testament to the power of the Human Spirit. Thank you for sharing this writing with me and those that read this Blog, Matt, I am glad to know you.
On 03-29-2019 I woke up from a dream at around 3:40am. I was dreaming about two characters in a book I am writing whose names are Micah (an angel) and Roman (a detective). Micah and Roman were engaged in a conversation about the trials or test that we go through in life. Roman, currently frustrated (understatement of the century) with some previous events had begun questioning Micah as to why God put him, or others for that matter, through trials. Micah then attempted to explain to Roman that not every trial we go through is due to God’s influence ( free will, of course, being a large part of that), and that most of the time the “test” or “trial” is self-initiated. It is only there because we allow it to exist. We allow there to be a choice for temptation to take us over, by exercising our free will (God granted) to choose. This concept Micah was speaking of comes from 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
After typing a bit of dialogue, I loaded into a truck with my brother and father for a three day trip out to Mason Texas where we planned on staying in a cabin on 700 acres of granite topped landscape in search of topaz, and Indian relics. The views were beyond amazing. We arrived early and after being greeted with a warm welcome, headed on to our cabin 2 ½ miles from the roadway. Upon arrival, we were anxious to start searching for treasures and started wildly unpacking to begin our journey. It was then my brother directed my attention to a cabinet that held jars of various pickled delights, showing me that they were available for purchase. It was also then that I directed his attention to the 18 decanters of Wild Turkey for sale just above said jars. We began inspecting them to find that they indeed contained delicious Kentucky bourbon and yes, most of them were sealed, though my inspection was contained to the limits of my nose.
My last drink of alcohol was 02-05-2018, and Wild Turkey 101 was my poison. “What a slap in the face!” I told my brother, and then immediately felt sorrowful for having even thought about it as a temptation. Yes, God may have put me there at that time, having earlier written about that concept, with that temptation, but it wasn’t God making it a temptation, it was me. God was there to give me the strength I needed when I was feeling weak to dispel the temptation I had created in my mind.
I know there are things that are out of our control, occurrences that come upon us because of the actions of others. But if we are honest, I believe we can surely observe that many of obstacles that we face are only made obstacles by our reaction to them. When we are strong in ourselves, then we are weak because we rely on ourselves to be sufficient enough to deal with the temptations of this world. But, when we are strong in Christ, temptation becomes an afterthought.
I want to give a HUGE shout out to @fast_winger for doing this incredible drawing of me for my Birthday Yesterday… You are a shining star.
For the last 2 months, I have only been writing, blog posts. It is comfortable not a lot of pressure, immediate feedback sometimes, good stuff.
But, in that time I have put my novel on the back burner. 3 months ago I began writing an incredible tale of a man that writes a book that brings him everything he could ever want, only when I got 61,000 words in the first month, I began doing author interviews.
I had no idea what would spring from this unbelievable, magnificent accident. It was all things that happened on a Whim. Seriously, I even put out a poll on Twitter that asked would anyone watch me tell jokes if I started a YouTube channel. Honestly, I was trying to get attention.
I had just released my first Novel and had no clue how to market it. I still don’t but I know more now which is great. So, after I got some positive responses I went ahead with the channel and decided to read my first book Dead Heart an Origin story on the channel.
Because I love the story…
Because no one else was reading it.
So, i went ahead and did that. It got watched by like, oh 20 people maybe. I was hardly a success, but I did discover that I loved being silly on camera and that my fear of being on camera quickly disappeared.
Then one night I was busy beating my head against a wall chasing everyone down to read my books when I thought- “This freaking sucks, how does anyone get heard over all the voices in a sea of Authors.
And then an Idea formed, how can I help other people sell their books since I cannot sell mine. I thought, well I have this incredibly successful YouTube channel with 7 subscribers, I should have authors on and talk to them about there books for the whole world to see. Yes, the whole world does watch my show. Who are you, the Census Bureau.
I then put out a tweet that will live in infamy, as I scheduled 40 + interviews off that one tweet. And the rest, as they say, is history. I am now a famous, globe trotter.
Seriously though the point is it came out of writing, it came from writing and it was a small silly idea that I ran with and is now in the process of taking off.
I say all that to say this, the time I have spent off from writing my book I have learned exactly what I needed to learn. I learned how to finish it. Not in like a just keep writing kind of way but in a “Oh now I understand where my character was headed all along” sort of way.
Life is funny like that. It teaches you that, the story is always there waiting to be written, but sometimes it needs to be lived first.
I am the Weaver. You cannot see me unless you know where to look. But I am here, watching; I have always been here.
I want to give a HUGE shout out to 
Seeking Purpose Today 